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Excel Saga (1999)
The Koshi Rikdo Assassination Plot
Excessively exuberant high school girl Excel Excel is excited about working for ACROSS... unfortunately, while prancing home on graduation day, she gets run over by a truck. Fortunately, the Great Will of the Universe resurrects her so she can go to work for the great Lord Ilpalazzo. Unfortunately, Lord Ilpalazzo is so annoyed with Excel's babbling that he kills her again. Fortunately, the Great Will just ressurects her again. Excel then proceeds to make an assasination attempt (under orders from Ilpalazzo) on the author of the "Excel Saga" manga, bungle her part-time job at a construction site (resulting in the unfortunate death of her immigrant worker friend Pedro), and get distracted chasing down a small dog for use as emergency rations.
The Woman From Mars
The city of F is being invaded by the Puchuus, deceptively cute aliens from Mars armed with laser-powered futon beaters! But the blissfully ignorant Excel is too busy with her new part-time job to care... until she has a direct run-in with the Puchuus! Meanwhile, the mysterious Nabeshin tries to get aboard the Puchuu mothership and reunite with his old friend Space Butler. Of course, it all goes to pot when Excel blows up the mothership, gets herself blasted over the hills and far away (where she's captured by guerilla troopers), and accidentally sends a capsule containing the frail Princess Hyatt into Ilpalazzo's lair, where Hyatt is drafted into ACROSS.
The Sacrificial Lamb of the Venomous Great Escape of Hell
Deep in the jungle, Excel is still being held captive by a band of guerilla troopers, along with the mysterious masked stranger, Tetsuko. As the two of them try to figure out an escape plan, Nabeshin shows up to rescue his old friend Tetsuko, and Excel badgers him into rescuing her, too. In the frantic escape that ensues, Tetsuko is mortally wounded, Nabeshin goes ape on the guerillas and their evil leader, and Excel reunites with Menchi and gets the hell out of Dodge. Meanwhile, the anemic Hyatt is assigned by Ilpalazzo to try to find Excel, and on the way ends up attracting the attention of Excel's clueless neighbor, Watanabe.
Love Puny
As Ilpalazzo struggles to figure out his new dating simulation game, Watanabe finds himself going on a date with Hyatt (or "Ayasugi-san", as he calls her), which is soon interrupted by his roommates, the obnoxious Iwata and the stoic, sardonic Sumiyoshi. Meanwhile, Excel (who is becoming increasingly jealous of Hyatt) becomes the target of an assassination plot, and the events in Ilpalazzo's game take on an alarming parallel to real-life events.
The Interesting Giant Tower
In order to pay the bills (and impress Hyatt), Watanabe seeks a job as a civil servant, and is not too happy to find that Iwata and Sumiyoshi have similar ideas. Meanwhile, Excel infiltrates the same civil service office building Watanabe and company have gone to, in an effort to dig up some dirt on the corrupt city government, and gets entangled in the machinations of Kabapu, the eccentric head of the Safety Assurance Agency.
The Cold is Winter! Snowed Under Episode
On a mission to get more "resources" for ACROSS, Excel and Hyatt travel to the mountains, where they proceed to get lost in the deep snow. Meanwhile, Watanabe and company meet the enigmatic, beautiful (and tempermental) Misaki Matsuya, and struggle to find the training center for their new jobs in the Safety Assurance Agency.
Melody of the Underground Passage
New Safety Assurance Agency recruits Watanabe, Iwata, Sumiyoshi, and Matsuya are assigned to investigate mysterious happenings in the sewers of F City! When the foursome blunders a bit too near the headquarters of ACROSS, Excel and Hyatt are placed in charge of getting rid of them. But none of them are prepared for what else is in the tunnels... a horde of Puchuus, including the dreaded Puchuu Queen!
Increase Ratings Week
At the request of a viewer (and, of course, in order to increase ratings), Excel Saga features an all-girls episode, in which only the females get any significant screentime. And as it happens, it's the hottest day of the summer, so everyone's going to the pool to cool off! Somewhere in all that is a plot about a pre-teen assassin named Cosette befriending Hyatt and Excel, but with all this fan-service, who really cares?
Bowling Girls
Excel and Hyatt are sent on a mission to determine the latest sport fad, in an effort to find some way to manipulate it to ACROSS's ends. Their chosen sport to investigate? Bowling, of course! But after getting jobs at a local bowling alley, Excel and Hyatt run afoul of an evil band of bowling terrorists known as the "Stick and Balls" group. With Hyatt held captive (along with two idol singers) by "Stick and Balls", Excel must learn enough about bowling from the legendary Nabeshin in order to beat the terrorists at their own game... literally!
Elegy to the Dogs
With Excel and Hyatt out of the house, Menchi takes advantage of an opportunity to escape, only to find that freedom isn't all its cracked up to be. Fortunately, she manages to find a band of stray dogs who offer to help her with her quest to find the home of her old owner. But can Menchi escape the wrath of a squad of paramilitary canines out to get her and her new friends?
Butt Out, Youth!
In order to nip the corruption of F City's youth in the bud, Excel and Hyatt get jobs as teachers at Excel's old high school, Inu-Nabe High. There, they tame a classroom of the roughest thugs at the school, and get themselves drafted into helping with the school baseball team. Seems Esop, the large-headed coach with a debilitating rectum disorder, needs all the help he can get, not only with whipping the team back into shape, but with getting back Inu-Nabe's secret weapon: their star pitcher, Binbou!
Big City Part II
Watanabe and his compatriots are sent by Kabapu to learn the art of detective work from Purin, a young cop with a bit of a split-personality, thanks to the restless spirit of her detective father, who won't rest until he finds the crooks who eluded his grasp after his death. Meanwhile, Excel has problems of her own, after two bumbling bank robbers kidnap Hyatt! (And in case you're wondering, there is no Big City, Part I)
The New Year's-End Party Hidden Talent Contest
As the old year draws to a close, the Excel Saga crew decides to take a break with a clip show disguised as a "talent show" between the Excel Team and the Hyatt team, with such delights as a preview for "Pedro: The Movie", the "Engrish" version of the "Beauty Theatre" shorts from Episode 8, and a domino exhibit set up by none other than Lord Ilpalazzo!
Prop
In order to pick up flagging ratings, the Excel Saga writers introduce a new character: the android lady Ropponmatsu, creation of Dr. Shioji, a brilliant scientist with a mostly-innocent (thank goodness) fixation with little girls. Iwata, of course, becomes hopelessly enamored with Ropponmatsu, completely clueless to the fact that she's not a living, breathing human. Meanwhile, Excel and Hyatt manage to bungle a seemingly simple mission to deliver a package with a bomb in it, one discovered and disarmed by Ropponmatsu... well, not quite, much to Iwata's dismay.
More! Prop Memorial
Annoyed that Ropponmatsu has bought it after only one episode, the merchandising team demands that she be put back in the show immediately. In the meantime, Iwata tries to put up with Ropponmatsu 2, an annoyingly cute little-girl version of the original Ropponmatsu, and Excel and Hyatt try their last mission over again, this time with a robot of their own!
Take Back Love!
After getting demolished again in the last episode, new copies of Ropponmatsu 1 and 2 are delivered to Watanabe's apartment. But by mistake, Excel and Hyatt accidentally activate the new models, which immediately become fixated with them, in more ways than one! But will this double dose of shoujo-ai end in tragedy... or just dark comedy?
Animation USA
On a mission to investigate the situation in America, Excel and Hyatt run into a band of street thugs... and a communication problem. Fortunately, they get some help from Sandora, the son of Excel's late friend Pedro, who is working as a cel animator to support his mother. But it seems these cels are being hoarded by an evil gangster, who quickly gets a hard lesson in the rules of cartoon heroics by an outraged Excel.
Municipal Force Daitenzin
Desperate for more material, the writers of "Excel Saga" take a page or two from Koshi Rikdou's old "masked heroes" parody Daitenjin, and have our hapless heroes in the Safety Assurance Agency (Watanabe, Iwata, Sumiyoshi, Matsuya, and both Ropponmatsus) made into the Municipal Force Daitenjin, against their will no less. In order to get out of the rather uncomfortable jumpsuits, the team goes about finding and dealing with all the terrible crimes (or not-so-terrible ones) they can find.
Menchi's Great Adventure 2 Around the World in 80 Hours
Menchi makes another break while Excel and Hyatt are out of town on a mission, and ends up on a boat to America. There, she meets Ann Anzai, a young lady who must travel the world in 80 hours before she can collect her inheritance from her grandfather, and accompanies the girl on her adventure. Can the two of them make it in time, and can Menchi defend her new friend from a mysterious assassin out to get both of them?
The Best of Mr. Pedro
Having charted the misadventures of Pedro, as he struggled for a season and a half to return home to his son and his sexy wife, the writers of Excel Saga have Excel and Hyatt sitting around in a bar and recapping Pedro's escapades. Yep, it's another clip show... but with a twist, as new footage is revealed showing the return of Nabeshin, and the kidnapping of the Great Will of the Macrocosm and Pedro's wife by the evil That Man!
Visually Appealing Type
Fed up with Ilpalazzo's lack of progress, ACROSS HQ sends the leather-clad, ruggedly handsome, and more-bishonen-than-thou agent Key to deliver an important message to Ilpalazzo. But rock-star wanabee Key, being the "artise" that he is, won't deliver his little singing telegram until his muse returns. In the meantime, an envious Ilpalazzo sends the lovestruck Excel and the blasè-as-usual Hyatt to keep an eye on Key. That's easier said than done, though, as Key hooks up with a down-on-their-luck "visual-type" band and turns them into superstars, even scoring them a big gig, where he plans to reveal his big message on national television...
Invasion, Mother
Having finally gotten the hint from ACROSS that he should hurry up the whole invasion thing, Ilpalazzo orders Hyatt to perform final preparations for the conquest of the city of "F", and orders the bungling Excel to keep her nose out of it. Excel has no time to be dejected, though: the Puchuus have returned, and she and Hyatt must help a band of freedom fighters thwart the machinations of an evil conqueror and his really big spaceship! But even after our favorite ACROSS agents defeat the invaders and destroy their ship, the city of "F" gets squashed by the falling debris. Well, them's the breaks...
Legend of the End of the Century Conqueror
We find Excel wandering the wasteland that once was "F" City, where she becomes entangled in a conflict between a settlement of survivors and a band of maraudering raiders. After fending off the thugs with her "ACROSS Martial Arts" (which involves beating the opponent in the right places 'til they turn into a Digi Charat character), Excel finally finds her beloved Ilpalazzo... only for him to strike her down callously. Without the Great Will to ressurect her, can the mortally wounded Excel survive? (She'd better, the series isn't over yet!)
For You, I Could Die
After Koshi Rikdo declares this episode to be gag-free, an amnesiac Excel gives the performance of her life after being rescued by the surviving members of the Safety Assurance Agency (i.e. all of them). But as she copes with her betrayal and tries to recover her identity, Ilpalazzo is having an identity crisis of his own, as his drive to conquer pushes him further forward. Angst and pointless plot twists abound as Excel searches for ACROSS... and Ilpalazzo struggles with his ambition.
We Will Not Be Held Responsible
Fed up with the insanity, Koshi Rikdo finally insists that the animation and writing crew finish the freaking series already. So, the Safety Assurance Agency locks horns with ACROSS, Excel tracks down Ilpalazzo and beats some sense into him, Watanabe finally realizes the truth about Hyatt, and the series finally comes to an end... or does it?
Going Too Far
In this aptly-named epilogue, an aborted attempt at making a musical version of Excel Saga is replaced by an exercise in pushing the boundaries of good taste for even Japanese television. As a small sampling of the insanity, Excel and Hyatt (the former more deranged than usual, the latter more sickly than usual) switch bodies, Cosette returns only to get naughty with Dr. Shioji, Watanabe takes Hyatt (in Excel's body) to a love hotel, Nabeshin gets married, and there's way too much blood and pointless violence. What better way to end a "Quack Experimental Anime"?