Daria (1997)

Arts 'n' Crass

Mrs. Dafoe, the art instructor, asks the talented Jane to submit a poster about student life and submit it into a contest. Jane draws a pretty girl looking into a mirror, with Daria adding a very negative poem about bulimia. The poster does not go over well with the school principal, Ms. Li, who orders it changed and submitted against their will. Daria and Jane don't take this without a struggle.

The Daria Hunter

Mr. DeMartino, Mr. O'Neill, and Mrs. Barch take their classes on a paintballing field trip. Daria and Jane ditch the group to go to a "great white shark" exhibit that turns out to be a tourist trap, and later new relationships are made (and broken) in tents after it starts to rain.

Quinn the Brain

Quinn writes a paper in Mr. O'Neill's English class that the teacher really likes and recites to the class. Quinn becomes scared that she will now become an outcast because people think she's a "brain", but just the opposite happens: she becomes a popular brain, and starts to work with it. Daria, meanwhile, finds herself losing her own identity since Quinn is the school brain now.

I Don't

The Morgendorffers are invited to the wedding of Helen's niece, and Helen insists that her daughters be bridesmaids. At the wedding, Helen keeps getting angry over issues she has with her sister, Rita, whom she despises. Daria, meanwhile, meets her other aunt, the cynical Amy, with whom she has quite a few things in common.

That Was Then, This is Dumb

Their old hippie friends, the Yeagers, who haven't changed a bit, visit Helen and Jake. An issue is raised over which family is living the better life now: the laid-back, old-fashioned Yeagers, or the modern, upwardly mobile Morgendorffers. Quinn takes an interest in the Yeagers' aloof, cynical son Ethan, who ends up telling her about their parents' former problems with the law. Daria, meanwhile, heads off to a flea market with Jane, Jesse and her continuing crush, Trent, where they attempt to sell Trent's old records.

Monster

Mr. O'Neill assigns his class to make short films. Daria and Jane decide to do theirs on a day in the life of Quinn, the purpose being to show everyone how shallow Quinn is. They get some great footage after Quinn freaks out over her pores, but Daria starts having second thoughts after noticing Quinn actually has some depth.

The New Kid

Daria joins the yearbook staff and takes a liking to the photo editor, Ted, a strange kid who's led a sheltered life under control-freak parents.

Gifted

Helen and Jake take Daria and Jodie to visit Grove Hills, a private school for A-students. Helen and Jake don't get along too well with Jodie's ultra-conservative black parents, while Daria and Jodie find out the students at Grove Hills are extremely stuck-up. Jodie tells them off, much to Daria's delight. Back in Lawndale, Quinn loses favor with all 3 Fashion Club members, and, afraid to be alone, comes to Jane's house and drives her nuts.

Ill

Attending Trent's band's concert, Daria develops a mysterious rash, which comes and goes, and winds up in the hospital.

Fair Enough

Meanwhile at the fair, Daria and Jane agree to a ferris wheel ride - with a sobby girl on board with them, too!

See Jane Run

In order to prove her P.E. teacher wrong (and to be around a guy she likes), Jane signs up for the track team, where she does very well and becomes a popular track star. However, she starts to find her friendship with Daria fading as a result of her new popularity.

Pierce Me

Trent asks Daria to help him find a birthday present for Jane, and the enraptured Daria lets him talk her into getting her navel pierced, which she later regrets. Helen, meanwhile, agrees to accompany Quinn in the ill-fated mother-daughter fashion show.

Write Where It Hurts

Daria is asked by Mr. O'Neill to write a story featuring people she knows as fictional characters. She develops a serious case of writer's block, and after several aborted story attempts (including takes on The Graduate and Sense and Sensibility), she starts to lose hope, until Helen gives her some advice. Daria winds up writing a great story about her family in the future.

Daria!

A musical episode in which seven song-and-dance numbers frame a story about an impending hurricane.

Through a Lens Darkly

Helen suggests that Daria get contact lenses after a bad-driving lesson, which Daria eventually agrees upon. However, Daria finds the contact lenses extremely uncomfortable and doesn't want to wear them anymore. But, not wanting to go back to the glasses, she winds up spending a day wearing neither one and bumping into people. Eventually, Brittany gives her some helpful advice about being herself.

The Old and the Beautiful

Ms. Li asks (read: orders) everyone to volunteer during Volunteer Week. Daria, Brittany and Kevin volunteer to read for senior citizens, but the seniors only like the perky Brittany and Kevin and are put off by Daria's unenthusiastic voice. The Fashion Club, meanwhile, volunteer to donate clothes for the homeless, but accomplishes nothing by being too picky about what to donate.

Depth Takes a Holiday

A quasi-fantasy episode in which 2 guys approach Daria dressed as a leprechaun and Cupid. They claim to be the spirits of St. Patrick's and Valentine's Days, and they ask her to help them find Halloween, Christmas and Guy Fawkes Day (a British holiday), who have escaped from Holiday Island. Daria at first doubts them (who wouldn't?) but then becomes convinced after Cupid puts a love spell on Helen and Jake. The 3 runaway holidays, as it turns out, have formed a band with Trent.

Daria Dance Party

The Fashion Club president, Sandi, talks Quinn into organizing the school dance, but Quinn doesn't do a very good job at it, since Sandi turns the entire Fashion Club against her. Quinn unloads the job on Jane, who turns the dance into a tribute to Jackson Pollock that becomes a huge success. At the dance, Quinn gets most of the credit for what Jane did, and Daria and Jane meet 2 guys whom they hit it off with--until the subject of who they're related to comes up.

The Lost Girls

Val, the editor of a self-titled teen magazine along the lines of "seventeen", comes to Lawndale High to hang out with Daria, after reading Daria's paper that Mr. O'Neill submitted. Val turns out to be an egomaniacal thirty something airhead who's trying way too hard to look and act like a teenager. How long before Daria tells her off?

It Happened One Nut

Daria and Quinn get jobs at the mall, neither of which goes over well for them. Daria works at a nut stand, where she gets salary deducted because she doesn't smile; what's worse, her co-worker, Kevin, is completely incompetent. Quinn works at the pet store, where she finds she has to work with "un-cute" animals as well as cute ones, and ends up causing havoc.

Lane Miserables

The Lane house gets a little too crowded when Jane and Trent's siblings and dad all move back home, at the same time. Unable to handle it, Jane and Trent stay with Daria's house--which puts Daria at a quandary, as she has to deal with her crush.

Jake of Hearts

Jake suffers a mild heart attack, which makes Daria aware of his mortality for the first time. She then has to deal with his judgmental mom coming to stay with them while he recuperates, and Jake confronts his mom about the way she views his military-freak father. Meanwhile, a pair of obnoxious radio DJs broadcast from Lawndale High for the entire week, and Daria finds that the only way to make them go away is to shame them into leaving.

Speedtrapped

Daria finally gets her driver's license, and soon thereafter has to drive to a nearby town to bail Jane and Mystik Spiral (Trent's band) out of a traffic violation. Unfortunately, she makes the mistake of taking along Quinn, who gives their money to a handsome hitchhiker. Daria and Quinn end up having to work together to get that money back.

The Lawndale File

A series of strange events--government agents visiting the school looking for anyone who's "different"; Mr. DeMartino getting arrested; Trent writing cheerful music--lead Daria and Jane to suspect alien presence at Lawndale. Meanwhile, a misunderstanding of something Mr. O'Neill says leads people to believe Daria and Jane are "atomic communists".

Just Add Water

Principal Li forces the entire school to raise funds by going on a casino cruise, on a run-down toilet of a ship. There, Quinn gets stood up by her date; Mr. DeMartino deals with his gambling addiction; and Daria and Jane try in vain to get some sleep. Eventually the ship crashes into a garbage scow; many jabs at Titanic ensue.

Jane's Addition

Daria and Jane are assigned a multimedia computer project, which is hindered by Trent's procrastination in coming up with music for it. Meanwhile, Jane starts dating a guy, Tom, whom Daria immediately sees as a threat to her friendship with Jane--until she and Tom have a talk about it.

Partner's Complaint

Mrs. Bennett has the class get into pairs for a budgeting project. Daria, angry at Jane for spending so much time with Tom, pairs up with Jodie instead; meanwhile Jane pairs up with Brittany. Daria and Jodie try to start their own business, but have trouble getting a loan from a bank because of their age and possibly Jodie's race. Jodie gets mad at Daria when she is criticized for using her father's clout in order to succeed. Meanwhile, Jane and Brittany try to purchase a car, but the car salesman seems much more interested in getting a date with Brittany.

Antisocial Climbers

Mr. O'Neill arranges a wilderness survival camping trip for the class, in order to experience firsthand the man-against-nature element of "The Call of the Wild". And experience it they do, what with Quinn's admirers electing to carry her bags instead of the food and supplies; Ms. Li ignoring student safety in order to get publicity from the trip; and a nasty blizzard that traps everyone in a cabin. Meanwhile, Helen and Jake stay in another cabin in the woods, hoping that their time alone will increase their level of intimacy and communication. They have trouble communicating until an injured and near-frozen Mr. DeMartino intrudes on them.

A Tree Grows in Lawndale

Kevin crashes his new motorcycle, injuring his knee. Temporarily unable to play football for the team (thereby also having to break up with Brittany), he can do nothing but feel sorry for himself, and the team goes on a massive losing streak that destroys the reputation of the school and the town. Taking a cue from Tom, Daria suggests that Kevin lecture to children about the dangers of motorcycles--which helps rebuild Kevin's self esteem, but does nothing for the team (whose replacement quarterback is a dangerous psycho). Kevin must make a decision: continue lecturing, or help the team out.

Murder, She Snored

When members of the football team get suspiciously perfect scores on Mr. DeMartino's history test, he suspects that one of them stole the answers--specifically Kevin, who was on academic probation at the time. Mr. DeMartino threatens to fail the whole class unless the guilty party confesses, and Daria later makes sarcastic jokes about killing Kevin for ruining her otherwise perfect academic record. At home, Daria has a dream that Kevin was killed, and although numerous people have a motive, Daria is considered the chief suspect. She enlists the relatively useless help of "Upchuck's Angels"--seen here as the Fashion Club with voluminous hair--to prove her own innocence. This episode manages to poke fun at numerous '70s action shows, including Hawaii Five-0, The Fugitive, and, of course, Charlie's Angels (duh!).

The 'F' Word

Mr. O'Neill has his students each try something they are sure to fail at, so that they can achieve personal growth. Daria attempts to have her parents ground Quinn so that she can't attend a fashion expo; Jane tries to dress fashionably conformist in an attempt to fit in; Kevin tries to be a bad athlete; Brittany tries to be unpopular by constantly talking about social issues; Jodie tries to talk her parents into letting her kick back during the summer; and Mack tries to teach Kevin about the 3 branches of government. Though Daria, Jodie and Mack fail in their tasks (and therefore succeed in the assignment), the other three unexpectedly succeed in their attempts. Kevin gets kicked off the football team after losing a game, and Brittany alienates the cheerleading squad, who try to replace her with Jane. Since nobody's life changed for the better thanks to their attempts, Mr. O'Neill feels he has failed as a teacher--until Daria and Jane convince him that by doing so, he has succeeded in his own assignment.

I Loathe a Parade

On an errand for her father, Daria runs into her school's annual parade where she encounters a lost child and strange feelings on a chance meeting with Jane's boyfriend.

Of Human Bonding

Psycho Therapy

Helen's law firm has her and her entire family come to a psychological center for personality evaluations..

Mart of Darkness

The new warehouse store is the place to go... out of your mind. Daria, Jane and many others are forced to brave the soul-crushing horror of discount shopping.

Legends of the Mall

Driving around Lawndale, Daria hears several of the local suburban legends.

Groped by an Angel

Quinn's obsession with guardian angels gets on Daria's nerves. A party at Brittany's introduces us to her stepmother... who looks and acts exactly like her.

Fire!

After the Morgendoffers bunk in a hotel after a house fire, Daria decides to stay with Jane, but Daria's growing friendship with Tom starts to strain the girls' relationship.

Dye! Dye! My Darling

After Jane picks a fight with Daria, Daria realizes to her consternation that she has fallen in love with her best friend's boyfriend.

Fizz Ed

Facing a lack of funds, Principal Li accepts a generous sum of money from a soda company, in exchange for letting them promote and advertise their product on campus. Daria has a problem with the fact that the school is being used in this manner, however, everybody--the school superintendent included-feels she has no right to complain since the arrangement is bringing the school the money it needs. Unfortunately, Ms. Li fails to meet the profit quota the soda company requires, and is forced to increase promotion of the product, to the point of including it in athletic uniforms and lesson plans. Ultimately the effort to amend the situation proves too much for her, and the soda company is forced to pull out of the deal (though it still leaves its logo in several strategically placed areas).

Sappy Anniversary

As the six-month anniversary of Daria and Tom's relationship approaches, Daria starts to feel like Tom is taking her for granted, since they never go out on dates or do anything romantic, like Tom did with Jane. She can't get herself to bring up the issue with Tom, but she talks to Helen about it, and Helen advises her not to expect too much or else she'll be disappointed. She realizes that though Tom didn't realize that the anniversary was approaching, neither did she at first (Quinn had to remind her). Additionally, Tom explains that he's not the romantic type--he did the romantic stuff with Jane only when he sensed their relationship was falling apart. The two of them decide to celebrate their anniversary even though they really don't have to. Meanwhile, Jake joins the staff of an internet start-up company. He is twice the age of the other employees, and never quite figures out what they're saying (they speak in buzz-words and techno-jargon) or what the company actually does. Though he learns, more or less, how to surf the web, his computer crashes before he can present his marketing plan, and he is let go. However, the head of the company realizes that Jake represents the older, technically clueless demographic that they're trying to reach, and decides to keep him on call as a consultant.

Fat Like Me

Sandi breaks her leg, and during her recovery gains a considerable amount of weight. Having violated the Fashion Club's strict maximum weight requirement, she resigns her presidency, placing Quinn in charge. Out of respect for Sandi (though partly because Sandi guilt-trips her), Quinn resigns too, but Stacy and Tiffany find it impossible to run the club without them--and their incredibly steep entry requirements prevent them from recruiting any new members. Meanwhile, Daria and Jane--who have been making a series of friendly wagers--make a bet as to whether the Fashion Club will dissolve completely, and they each try to influence Quinn in order to win the bet. Jane--who predicts the club will fall apart--convinces Quinn not to take over as president, but Daria subtly convinces her to help Sandi lose weight. Once Sandi gets back to her original weight, the Fashion Club gets back together, though with a noticeable shift in power.

Camp Fear

Daria and Quinn attend a reunion at Camp Grizzly, the summer camp that is the source of nothing but bad memories for Daria. There, Quinn finds that the crowd she hung out with is a little too much like the Fashion Club, and Daria finds that she's too antisocial for her own good--especially after she starts pushing away a fellow misfit, Amelia, who really looks up to her. However, by refusing to follow a crowd, Daria inspires Amelia to stand up to Skip, the obnoxious "big guy at camp" whose self-imposed authority everyone is afraid to question. Trent starts getting fed up with Mystik Spiral, and Jane suggests that he give Daria and Quinn a ride to camp, then stay in the woods for a while to think things through. Trent and Jane meet an elderly storekeeper and his wife, whom Trent first thinks are full of country wisdom, but who turn out to be lamebrained purveyors of inedible snack foods. The experience is not a total loss, though, as it provides Trent with inspiration for a new song. Helen and Jake spend the weekend cleaning out the garage, which is filled with recreational equipment that they never got to use, since Helen always had to work whenever they made plans.

The Story of D

Daria writes a story that she plans to submit to publication, but is reluctant to let anyone read it. She gives it to Jane and Tom to read--Jane thinks it needs a little work, but Tom likes it and encourages her to submit it. She submits it to a magazine, but it gets rejected. This discourages her, but she decides to give it another go after learning Jake went through a similar situation with a song he wrote when he was her age. The Fashion Club seeks to win a humanitarian award by donating a mirror for the school bathroom, but they first have to get the money to buy the mirror. They decide to start a newsletter and sell it, but get discouraged when all of the fashion predictions they publish turn out wrong. Meanwhile, after learning of the reasons behind her niece Erin's failed marriage, Helen starts to keep a close eye on Daria, making sure she isn't rushing into sex with Tom.

Lucky Strike

When Principal Li fails to honor the raise promised in the teachers' contracts, the teachers go on strike. Substitutes are hired to take their place, including a spaced-out elderly woman to take over for Mr. DeMartino; and a sleazebag for Mr. O'Neill's class who is soon fired for hitting on Tiffany. That substitute's replacement is none other than Daria. Quinn starts to fear that the truth about her sibling relationship to Daria will come out, especially when she keeps having to defend Daria in front of her friends. Daria tries to teach the class Shakespeare's "Romeo and Juliet", and when she assigns a test, Quinn finds that she knows the play well enough to ace it. When Quinn gets a much better grade than the rest of the Fashion Club, Sandi brings up the question of Quinn's relationship to Daria. Quinn finally admits, with no shame, that she and Daria are sisters. While the strike is going on, the Lane siblings end up helping the teachers--Jane by creating posters, and Trent by writing inspiring lyrics for Mr. O'Neill to sing.

Art Burn

A gazebo at the Lane residence collapses, and Jane and Trent decide to have it rebuilt because of its sentimental value to their brother, Wind. Jane tries to sell her paintings at an art fair to pay for the repairs, and winds up getting hired to re-create famous paintings for a gallery. Though this becomes financially lucrative for Jane, she gets no creative stimulation from it and contemplates quitting. Meanwhile, Trent hires three slackers to fix the gazebo, and is unsuccessful in getting them to actually do any work. At the art fair, the Fashion Club let a caricaturist draw them, and are so insulted by the drawing that they plan to sue him, a mission that they are persistent at despite Helen's advice against it. Ironically, when Jane and Trent's parents come home, they say that they plan to get rid of the gazebo; and Stacy keeps the caricature drawing because, unbeknownst to anyone else, she liked the way it turned out.

One J at a Time

Helen encourages Daria to invite Tom over for dinner, but Daria is reluctant to do so because she fears Jake's erratic behavior will embarrass everyone, especially after he starts obsessing over catching a squirrel that's been knocking over his garbage cans. Helen tells her that she will try to control Jake if Daria invites Tom over. Quinn, meanwhile, decides to find one boy to date exclusively, to show that she is mature enough to do so. Her detailed search for the lucky guy is based entirely on fashion sense, and it's ultimately narrowed down to Jamie, Jeffy and Joey. However, Daria starts playing with her mind and giving her unrealistic expectations for what an exclusive relationship entails (i.e., being together 24/7, adjoining burial plots, etc.), and during the course of a couple of days Jamie and Joey are both dumped, leaving Jeffy the one to come to dinner with Tom. At dinner, Jake's squirrel problems end up causing male bonding between him, Tom and Jeffy, and the three of them set out to trap the squirrel together. Quinn finally breaks down from the pressure of her situation, and Helen tells her that if going out with different guys is what makes her happy, that's what she should do until she's ready for a boyfriend.

Life in the Past Lane

Jane starts dating Nathan, a guy whose clothing and lifestyle are extreme vintage retro, mixing elements from the 20s, 30s and 40s. She is charmed at first by his ways, and even starts dressing in retro outfits, though Daria and Tom don't quite share her enthusiasm. However, it soon becomes obvious that Nathan takes his lifestyle way too seriously, and the relationship ends. Meanwhile, Upchuck begins performing magic acts in yet another attempt to attract women. Surprisingly, he is successful this time--he wins Stacy's heart, as well as her participation in a Houdini act he performs for the entire school.

Aunt Nauseam

Helen's sister Rita asks her to handle her daughter Erin's divorce, and Helen reluctantly agrees despite the fact that she and Rita never get along. Rita ends up coming without Erin to the Morgendorffers', and as they hammer out the details of the divorce, their usual rivalries start to spring up, mainly revolving around their mother's favoritism toward Rita. Jake is unable to handle all the fighting, and decides to leave the house until Rita goes away. Daria calls Aunt Amy (who is like an older version of herself) to come and help mediate, but Amy only ends up joining in the argument herself. Ultimately, it is Daria and Quinn who help patch things up between the three sisters. The whole ordeal affects Daria and Quinn's outlooks: the talk of divorce makes Daria uneasy about spending time with Tom, while the rivalry between the sisters makes Quinn fear that she and Daria might someday wind up the same way. Meanwhile, Stacy and Tiffany find themselves inadvertently breaking a Fashion Club rule when they but identical dresses. Complications ensue.

Prize Fighters

As graduation looms over the horizon, Helen encourages Daria to apply for a scholarship. Due to her lack of extracurricular activities, the only scholarship Daria has a good chance at is one sponsored by the Wizard Corporation, which only requires that its applicants enter an essay contest. Daria's essay makes her a finalist, but she finds herself competing for the scholarship with Jodie and Upchuck, both of whom appear to have a greater chance at winning. Additionally, Daria finds that the corporation has extremely racist and sexist business practices, and as the interviews approach, she questions whether she really wants to pander to their level in order to win. Meanwhile, academic underachiever Jane starts to feel left out. This season has had a running joke involving Jake's failed attempts at cooking. Here, he receives a huge bulk order of hot dogs by mistake and tries to make the best of it.

My Night at Daria's

After a rumor goes around that Daria and Tom slept together, Daria starts to wonder if it is time to take the relationship "to the next level."

Boxing Daria

Daria becomes upset by memories of an argument her parents had when she was a child, which may have been caused by one too many parent/teacher conferences over her refusal to socialize. She later learns that her problems as a kid were just something that comes with being smart.